Language is a strange beast. It’s essential to articulate needs, facilitate transactions and transmit vital information. But humans also use it in another crucial way: to deepen personal connections. From social chitchat at work to a heart-to-heart with a friend, when you’re in a room with someone, it’s language that you turn to, intersected with mannerisms and intonation. And when you write, language is all there is.
For something so important, then, it’s worrying that today the words we use seem less and less able to get a point across. As technology gives a voice to all, and everyone competes to make themselves heard, the tendency to hyperbolise (in other words, to overstate for dramatic effect) is increasing. And the more used to exaggeration we become, the less it means.
Better than ever
Mass-media advertising turbo-charged hyperbole in the 20th century. These days there may be legal constraints around how much you can promise a product to achieve, but there’s a hyperbolic implication nonetheless: that something you buy can make you smarter, more attractive, a better parent or just the person you’ve always wanted to be.
It’s also a facet of everyday life. Sportspeople promise to perform at ‘1,000 per cent’. Commuters describe morning traffic as ‘an absolute nightmare’. The first signs of a cold prompt ‘I’m dying of flu’, while feeling a bit peckish becomes ‘I’m starving’.
There’s a delight in the dramatic, but in many cultures, flamboyant displays of emotion are frowned upon. Maybe verbal exaggeration is the preserve of more emotionally reserved people because all that’s left is the language. And maybe – when we all know it’s exaggeration – that’s okay.
But there’s been a change in recent years, perhaps caused by the inflammatory, amplifying power of the internet. It’s often said that politics is more polarised than ever, and exaggerated language in political discourse is a symptom – or a cause – of that. On social media, hyperbole is regularly flung around by people who, when questioned, admit to more nuanced takes. But what happens when exaggeration becomes normalised? When what was once over the top is accepted as standard?
Exaggeration fatigue
‘There’s definitely a “crying wolf” effect,’ says Michelle M Kundmueller, an associate professor of political science at Old Dominion University in Norfolk, Virginia, in the US. ‘If everything is a disaster… [then] why pay attention at all?’
If you’re wondering how things might have changed, consider what the reaction these days might be to the British prime minister Winston Churchill’s famous speech in May 1940, shortly after the start of World War Two. Speaking to Parliament in the House of Commons, he effectively conveyed the UK’s new policy to the world: ‘…to wage war against a monstrous tyranny, never surpassed in the dark, lamentable catalogue of human crime’.
But 85 years later, in an age of exaggeration fatigue, modern listeners might think his words no different to regular expressions of outrage. When similar language is used hundreds of times a day, the ‘crying wolf’ effect carries the danger that nothing can be taken seriously. But exaggerated language has an effect on more than discourse and perception of reality. As Michelle says: ‘If we’re constantly distracted by emerging emergencies, there’s no time, community support or peace in life. There’s an inherent bias towards the negative, the short term and the reflexive, as opposed to focusing on… art, loving relationships and the development of nuanced understanding and decisions.’
It’s tempting to use the language of extremes. But if it’s not helpful, how do you row back from it, and encourage a return to a more realistic interpretation of the world? Well, perhaps there is an answer and it’s one that lies far back in the past, back in the same soil that birthed the word ‘hyperbole’.
Introducing sophrosyne
The ancient Greek word ‘hyperbole’, meaning ‘throwing beyond’, was used as a literary and rhetorical device to add vividness to language, rather like flavouring a meal with salt. However, there’s another Greek term, less well-known today, that may provide humanity with the cure to exaggeration fatigue.
In ancient Greece, ‘sophrosyne’ was an admirable quality. A person displaying it is temperate, moderate and shows excellent self-control. An expert on the literature and philosophies of ancient Greece, Michelle has a particular love of it. Her book, Homer’s Hero: Human Excellence in the Iliad and the Odyssey, places sophrosyne at its centre. ‘It’s my favourite of the ancient Greek virtues, and the key to everything in life,’ she says. It’s central to Homer, Plato, Aristotle and to all good understandings of how one prevents both individual (or self) and political tyranny.’
This self-control, Michelle says, was considered by the ancient Greeks to be a moral excellence. ‘In both literature and in philosophy, we see that it is playing a central role in individual worth, individual preservation and in one’s capacity to benefit rather than harm one’s community.’ It’s often translated as moderation or self-restraint, she explains, because it’s ‘the virtue that permits us to stop, consider and make a decision in line with other moral excellences, like wisdom or justice’.
Michelle uses as an example Homer’s epic poem The Odyssey, which tells of its hero Odysseus’s long journey back home after the Trojan War, beset by challenges from all sides. The main characters learn – sometimes the hard way – to adopt sophrosyne. Odysseus ‘must learn to restrain both his bodily needs (like the desire for sleep) and his spirited impulses (like the desire to hit back when taunted), in order to gain a successful homecoming. Without the virtue sophrosyne, this would not have been possible’.
In today’s world, contrarily, it’s often seen as desirable to act on spirited impulses and bodily needs. Yet when it comes to emotional excess, perhaps a bit of restraint may help us all. Sophrosyne, says Michelle, stops us from knee-jerk reactions and short-term responses that can cause long-term harm.
The philosopher Plato’s description of fellow theorist Socrates’ teachings in his dialogue The Republic describes the soul as having three parts: truth-seeking, honour-seeking and pleasure-seeking. Socrates, Michelle says, describes a ‘justly ruled soul’ as one that balances these three ‘with moderation – with sophrosyne.’ Sophrosyne, she says, is necessary so as not to ‘be ruled by one’s momentary desires in a chaotic and ultimately miserable fashion’.
While it may be unrealistic to expect temperance in all things, there’s much to be learned from this ancient concept.
‘Sophrosyne is how we stop doom-scrolling and make our own decisions… Without sophrosyne one is at the mercy of the politician or the company with the most outrageous headline,’ concludes Michelle. ‘For without sophrosyne, in an age of insistent exaggeration, who has the peace of mind necessary to share a calm or happy meal with a friend or family member? Let alone the state of mind that permits one to look across the table into the eyes of others?’
When we’re often told we have no control over our addiction to smartphones or clickbait headlines, it’s comforting to know that the ancient Greeks also grappled with the problem of a temperance deficit. As Michelle says: ‘Sophrosyne lets cool heads prevail in many situations.’
So perhaps the way out of this isn’t necessarily a digital detox or an escape to the hills. It can be in the daily practice of sophrosyne. That is: moderation, self-restraint and self-control.
Seek composure in a world of stimulation
How to make the shift from hyperbole to sophrosyne
Notice your internal responses
Michelle says: ‘I’m actually not sure you can have a more sophrosyne life, but you can be a more sophrosyne person.’ Begin by noticing when others use hyperbole, and how it affects you when you hear overly negative, dramatic language – online, on the news or in your daily interactions. Does your heartbeat quicken or your breathing shorten? Do you imagine you’re safe or in danger? Do you feel the urge to argue or get away?
Recognise your external responses
Once you’ve begun to recognise the hyperbole around you, observe how you respond to it. Do you feel the need to match other people’s drama with your own? If you find yourself regularly using words like ‘outrageous’, ‘disgusting’ and ‘hateful’, notice how using these words makes you feel.
Begin the process of regulation
Hyperbolic communications might take place on social media or in emails, at work or with family and friends. You can’t stop others’ inflammatory language, but you can choose not to respond in the same way. Michelle suggests choosing one area where you can practise sophrosyne, ‘…and then, over time, expanding it to others’.
Hold your core strong
Sophrosyne is an internal practice, so hold your core strong. Remember to take a mental step back and breathe before you leap in with inflammatory words. While you can’t stop the drama, you can choose to withdraw from the stage. Don’t allow yourself to be swayed by the whims of others. Avoid people who regularly exaggerate, or limit your interactions with them. If they’re in your household, find a way to refresh yourself after being in their company.
Relearn the language of moderation
Consider the perpetual temptation to reach for the hyperbolic. It can have much the same effect as eating three packets of biscuits in one go: it feels tasty, it’s addictive and it’s ultimately unsatisfying. Learn to strive for accuracy: are you genuinely ‘starving’, or just a bit hungry and fancy a snack? Were you actually ‘dying’ last week, or was it just a headache or a cold? As you use more temperate language, notice how it affects your thought processes and the reactions of others.
Keep hyperbole where it belongs
Remember that extreme adjectives do have their place, but it’s a limited one. Allow yourself to feel strong emotions, embody them and let them flow through. But when it comes to behaviour and everyday language, sophrosyne – or moderation – is key to a balanced life, at least according to the ancient Greeks. So take a leaf out of Plato and Homer’s books and strive for the ultimate: the middle of the road.